Opening the Doors of Love with the Female Self

Opening the Doors of Love

MONITOR: We will focus upon the Female Self, stating at the outset that she fulfills essential functions for the maturation of the personality and its unification with its Soul.  The Male Self serves complementary functions, yet the Female Self is principally responsible for opening the doors of Love within the personality.  When the personality is capable of giving and receiving Love, the Female Self takes the initiative.  The Male Self is responsible primarily for opening the doors of power in the personality.  Both themes intertwine throughout personality development.

Need for Love

Because of her energetic configuration, the Female Self needs the experience of Love in order to receive, nourish and give birth to the creative elements of the personality for which she is responsible.  Without Love, the Female Self is often brutalized by the energies of the lower planes of Earth.  Forces in the astral plane often contain fear, and if the Female Self lacks sufficient Love, she is brutalized by fear.

Because the physical form reflects the higher forms of the personality, the physical female body is weaker in terms of muscle strength, reflecting the need of the Female Self to act with sensitivity and intelligence, as opposed to relying upon brute power.

Lessons of Power

The Female Self is challenged to learn the lessons of power after she learns the lessons of Love.  Then she may use power with the motive of Love and achieve competence, awareness and spiritual connection.

Challenge of Fear

The principal challenge of the Female Self resides in how she reacts to the experience of fear.  If she allows fear to cause her to disconnect from spiritual sources, she becomes overwhelmed with her internal and external experiences.  Her sensitivity tends to overload her capacity for coping with life experience.  She flounders without a sense of purpose and feels lost in the midst of intense storms of emotion.  In such conditions, the Female Self loses her ability to share Love, beauty and grace.

Creation of Form

The Female Self works within the purview of the Divine Feminine principle, which involves the creation of form that allows the evolution of indwelling Life.  The feminine energy configuration emphasizes the creation of form, whether in the form of a physical body of a baby, the form of a relationship with a mate, a family, or relationship to all of Life.

Sensitivity and Energetic Boundaries

The feminine energy emphasizes sensitivity to others, carefully reading others for signs of friendly or hostile intention.  The sensitivity acts as a needed boundary at the periphery of the feminine energy field.  If the boundary proves inadequate, feminine energy draws in energies that may prove conflicting and harmful.  When those energies are brought to the core of her energy field, intense disruption may take place.

The feminine energy form must therefore develop adequate boundaries which may only be developed through sensitivity and powers of discernment.  Discernment becomes enhanced when the feminine energy, or Female Self, achieves spiritual connection with the High Self.

The Female Self is challenged to place her attention upon her outermost boundaries in order to maintain her safety and well-being.  In learning the lessons of Love, the Female Self often has a tendency to forget about maintaining effective boundaries.  Thus, she has a tendency to neglect her own proper nourishment.

Internal and External Love Sources

She often perceives her greatest need as receiving Love from the external world, yet that desire often occurs through the influence of illusion and glamour.  The Female Self has a primary need to choose to experience Love and then spiritually connect with the High Self and other sources of Higher Consciousness.  If she does this, she may learn that she is  then able to attract the Love she desires, because she has first created Love within the core of her being by utilizing the concept of “like attracts like.”

In learning these lessons, the Female Self repetitively struggles with the power of fear, learning through suffering how to choose to create Love within her core, as opposed to allowing fear to dominate her being.  Thus, the Female Self learns the principal lesson of power in overcoming her fear.

Illusion and Glamour

When dominated by fear, the Female Self is strongly inclined to follow the dictates of illusion and glamour.  Her energies often fragment and dissipate.  She becomes a worrier, a fretter, a discordant and pulsating energy field.  This state of relative helplessness creates almost automatic victimization.

Victimization and Rescue Illusion

When the Female Self is unable to recognize the Love at the core of her being and is distracted by fear, her energy field tends to fragment, becoming ineffective.  At such times, the Female Self experiences repeated failure.  Her desires are not fulfilled.  She is often caught for long periods of time, including a series of lifetimes, in an illusory image that she will be rescued by an external force.  Most often she perceives that force as masculine.

In this dilemma, the Female Self experiences the crux of her challenge, which is expressed as a choice of whether or not she discounts her feminine expression of energy, or uses it as a creative force.  She must learn to empower herself, as opposed to waiting for an external power to rescue her.  When this crisis is reached, the Female Self often complicates her learning process by seeking an external rescuer in the form of a male, only to experience failure due to a variety of factors.

Unworthiness

When one failure leads to others, the Female Self is easily convinced of her own lack of worth.  She often feels unworthy of being loved.

Love as the Key

In that time of crisis, her challenge lies in using her indomitable will to create Love within the core of her being.  If she does that, she has the key to resolving her problems and in meeting her challenges.

When she self-activates or ignites her own Love, the Female Self is capable of learning the lessons of power; she is capable of balancing the pressure of external forces with the internal radiance of Love which brings spiritual connection and wisdom to her.  With access to wisdom, she learns discernment and wisely manages her relationships with others.  When she is fully activated with Higher Consciousness, the Female Self is capable of radiating a pure force of Love throughout the planet.  When she has learned through wisdom to identify with all of Life, the Female Self becomes a channel of immense capabilities in bringing Love to bear upon all of the Life forms of the planet.

Assisting the Male Self with Lessons of Love and Power

Ultimately, as the Female Self integrates with the Male Self in the developing personality, she teaches the Male Self the lessons of Love and assists him in learning the lessons of power which offer the greatest challenge for him.  She learns how to teach through example and, by acting  in a fair, balanced and reciprocal manner, assists the Male Self in learning how to do the same.

Androgynous Consciousness

In achieving a unified state of masculine and feminine forces, the Female Self merges with the Male Self.  Her identity is not lost, but, transformed as an emergent state of androgynous consciousness is created in a highly effective, radiant energy field.

As androgynous consciousness is achieved in the personality, the Soul that sponsors the personality can act in terms of wholeness and full intention to benefit all of Life.  At that time, all illusions, glamours and maya are easily dissipated from the bodies and chakra system of the personality.  The personality becomes a radiant force of Love-wisdom in the world.

As various degrees of Spiritual Mastery are achieved, the personality acts more fully as an agent of the Soul, until finally the personality merges with the Soul, thus completing the Soul’s projection into the lower planes of Earth.  The Soul has, in that process of evolution, brought crucial illumination to the elemental and devic consciousness of the Planetary Being.  The Soul and the Planetary Being benefit each other.

Evolution of Planetary Being

In androgynous consciousness, the feminine energy, or Female Self, is expressed with greater freedom and force than has previously been possible in states of relative isolation.  The masculine force, or Male Self, is similarly enhanced.  Androgynous energy brings fulfillment to the devas and elementals composing the Planetary Being.  Wise Love permeates the substance of the planet, stimulating the Planetary Being into a state of higher integration of its own disparate components.

Souls come to Earth, contribute to its evolution, and move on to other planets and solar systems, following their own course of evolution.  Their action is similar to that of bees that assist in the pollination of flowers and trees.  The Planetary Being evolves through such ministrations and ultimately produces its own accomplishment of androgynous consciousness composed of a broader range of elements than are found in the Soul.  Life evolves through the world of form in a variety of ways.

We believe this provides a basis for addressing questions.

Questions and Answers

Q1: Need for External Love vs. Self-Sufficiency

JUDITH: Monitor, when you described the point where the Female Self comes to a point of crux, where she is needing Love and looking for it outside herself, expecting to be rescued, I had the song from Snow White, “Some day my prince will come,” pop into my mind.  Our culture has a conflict between the popular culture impressing upon little girls and women the idea that there is “a prince out there” who will save them, take care of them, and make their lives complete, and a very strong feminist movement which makes such statements as, “A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.”  The feminist stance seems to be a total denial of the need for sharing between the genders.  I don’t know if we’re just trying to come to a point of equalization of genders, or what.  Would you please comment on this conflict?

Maya

MONITOR: We find that the cultural teachings are strongly based upon illusions and glamours that, when combined, create the force that we call “maya.”  By these forces, men and women are bound in various forms of imprisonment.  Each individual is then challenged to achieve freedom.

Women may best be assisted by persistent, consistent pursuit of more profound experiences of Love.  Ultimately, each woman discovers that the most profound Love is found within herself, not within any other person.  While some interpersonal relationships may be beneficial and nourishing to her, a woman discovers the treasure of her own quality of being when she discovers her ability to create Love.

Cultural forces are quite confused and in transition, as the changing of cosmic forces brings a rearrangement between the genders in the physical, etheric and astral planes.

Relationships in the Next (21^st) Century

In the next century, men and women in the lower planes of Earth will find themselves at first facing intense challenges.  Then, as they successfully meet their internal challenges, they will find enhanced external opportunities for relationship with each other.

Part of this transition involves the individual personality’s realization that it contains both masculine and feminine forces.  When those forces, or energies, are more closely related and unified within the individual, spiritual connection is enhanced.  With spiritual connection, a person accelerates growth and achieves integration in a relatively brief time.  As increasing numbers of persons achieve higher states of personality integration involving masculine and feminine forces, they revolutionize their relationships.

This revolution may be described, in general, as moving out of the misunderstandings and abreactions produced by glamour, illusion and maya into a simpler, plainer ability to share Love.  Many of the complications of present relationships will dissolve.  Significant changes in the quality of physical life will provide the leverage to motivate such changes.  One hundred years from this date (2095), with reduced human population in the physical plane, male and female relationships will appear considerably simpler and more satisfactory.  They will be based upon mutual respect, support and challenge.

Have we addressed your question?

JUDITH: Yes and created many more.  I’ll ask them later in the evening.  Thank you.

Q2: Female Born into a Male-Dominated Family

JULIE: Monitor, is there a reason that a female form would come into this plane and deal with a male-dominated family, by a father and brothers, dominated more by male than female?  Assuming that this situation occurs as part of a process, how does it fit into the total process?

MONITOR: Each birth into the physical plane occurs according to a highly refined plan, established by the High Self of the personality in cooperation with the High Selves of the other personalities involved in the family.

A girl born into a family dominated by males will learn lessons of power.  She will be subjected to the exercises of power by the males, consisting of her father and brothers primarily.  She will be forced by those circumstances to develop her masculine characteristics as a means of defending her rights and well-being.  The Female Self, in such situations, may be placed in a position of being more dependent upon the assistance of the Male Self.

This type of circumstance often occurs when a Female Self, in earlier lifetimes, has chosen to act independently instead of merging with the Male Self.  She has opportunity to develop her own strengths and self-reliance, yet at some point she must be motivated to seek a deepening relationship with [her corresponding] Male Self.  Entering into a family dominated by males, or masculine energy, may provide her with such motivation.

Have we addressed your question?

JULIE:          Yes.  Thank you, Monitor.

Q3: A Mother’s Opportunity

DONNA: As a continuance of that question, does a woman who has sons have different problems, or different lessons, than the woman who is born into a family with brothers?

MONITOR: She has some similar lessons, yet other challenges in the role of mother who is in a position of power to guide the development of her sons.  A mother exercises the greatest influence over her children, and especially her sons, when she is motivated by Love.  When she is motivated by fear, she often seeks to dominate her children, especially her sons who are more difficult to control.

If she is motivated by Love, a mother instills a loving response in her children  Her efforts at assisting them are more easily returned when they respond in Love.  Love engenders Love; fear engenders fear.  The feminine challenge may therefore be expressed as choosing to create Love instead of fear.  No matter what the social role of the woman, she faces the same central challenge.

Have we addressed your question?

DONNA: Yes, I think so.  Thank you.

Q4: Woman in Family of Women

HELEN: On the other side of that coin, what about the woman who has all daughters, all granddaughters, and all great granddaughters?  Is there a lesson there for the Female Self?

Integration of Love and Power through Wisdom

MONITOR: The mother and grandmother roles offer wonderful opportunities for demonstrating an example of a Love-centered life.  Love may be expressed in many ways, yet when it is expressed with discernment and wisdom, it provides a powerful example of what consciousness can achieve in human form.  Do you not approach an understanding of the Divine Feminine principle through recognition of some woman’s demonstration of loving wisdom, whether as a mother, a friend, an aunt, a grandmother, or whatnot?  Through demonstration of what is possible, in the integration of Love and power through wisdom, much may be achieved.

Q5: Communication of Female Self with Outer Self

JULIE G: When Female Selves want to communicate with their Outer Self, what methods do they use?

Communication through Emotion

MONITOR: A Female Self often relies upon emotions as a means of communicating with the Outer Self.  Emotions are often a center of attention for the Female Self.  She becomes quite conversant with them and learns what emotions will most strongly affect the Outer Self.

If the Outer Self is open and sensitive to recognize the emotion presented by the Female Self, that means of communication will suffice.  An Outer Self may perceive a sense of sadness, for example, then inquire as to which Self expresses that sadness.  Through inquiry, the Outer Self may learn that the Female Self feels sad concerning some situation.  In that way, communication may be achieved.

Communication through Physical Sensation

However, if the Outer Self is distracted, preoccupied or otherwise insensitive to emotional signals, the Female Self must rely upon the creation of physical sensations to gain its attention.  For example, she may cause sensations of heaviness and restriction in the chest as a way of gaining the attention of the Outer Self.

Communication through Physical Obstacles & Illness 

If the Outer Self fails to communicate with the Female Self after receiving a signal of physical sensations, the Female Self has little recourse but to create physical experiences, which may consist of accidents, obstacles or illness in the physical body as a means of attempting to gain the attention of the Outer Self.

We advise each person to consider their daily experiences and ask their Female Selves to give them a specific signal of emotion or physical sensation.  If the Outer Self is willing to cooperate,  such agreement may save considerable difficulties.

Q6: Love Addiction

JUDITH: Monitor, based on some of what you said earlier, I’m interested in what is to me a new phenomena, coming across people who are “love addicts.”  I wonder if this is connected to the Female or Male Basic Selves.  And by the term, “love addict,” I mean people who are caught up in the high emotion of first falling in love, then have relationship after relationship simply because they need to be in that state.

MONITOR: That type of infatuated state may occur with either Male or Female Selves.  It represents a time of energization of either one or both Basic Selves.  The energization occurs because of an opening in the boundaries or barriers of the Self.  When the opening or receptivity of the Self is increased, it receives a higher amount or quality of Life energy that creates stimulation for it and for the chakra system and bodies of the personality.

The Outer Self may regard this type of experience as “exhilaration” and also be motivated to repeat the experience.  However, over a period of time, repetition of the experience produces a dwindling effect because illusions and glamours proliferate under such circumstances.  The illusion of separation becomes reinforced, and its related glamours are multiplied through repeated experiences of infatuation.

When the Self involved in addictive experiences of infatuation learns how to seek Love within its own core through spiritual connection, such addiction may be overcome.  This form of learning experience does create wonderful opportunities for learning the lessons of Love and the lessons of power which involve moving through an oscillation between states of victimization and states of domination, ultimately arriving at an understanding that first Love must be sought, then power.

JUDITH: Thank you.  As I listen to you, I realize I’ve been judgmental about this in a way that was not very healthy.  Now I have a better understanding of what’s happening in such instances.

MONITOR: The tendency towards judgment stems from one aspect of your Female Self and your Mental Judge Self.

JUDITH: Yes, thank you.

Q7: Female Need to Be Heard

JULIE G: I’ve just been reading John Gray’s latest book on male/female relationships called What Your Mother Couldn’t Tell You And Your Father Didn’t Know.  His premise is that the Female Selves, or females, need most for their male partner to listen to them talk without trying to solve their problems.  By doing that, women nurture their feminine self.  Women need that nurturing in order to be able to give support and appreciation to the male, which is what he needs.  I’d like to have you comment on that premise.

Female Focus on Relationships

MONITOR: We find those observations to be accurate.  His statements about the needs of women may be applied to the needs of the Female Self, and his statements about the needs of men apply to the needs of the Male Self.

The Female Self focuses upon relationships because of her need to learn to manage her boundaries.  Her boundaries are formed, tested and refined through the interaction of relationships. Thus, the Female Self and women in general are inclined to give primary focus to relationships.

Male Focus on Action

Men and Male Selves are dealing with different developmental needs which relate to the radiatory force from the center to the periphery, as experienced by the masculine expression of Life.  The Male Self, or men in general, needs to focus upon action – the process of expressing what is formulated at the core of their being and then expressed through the periphery.  The Male Self, therefore, needs to focus upon creation of concepts, testing and refining them through actions.

Benefit of Interweaving of Male and Female Needs 

Male and female developmental needs interweave.  They afford each other excellent opportunities for growth, especially when one gender is motivated to learn about the other.  With that learning, comes respect, understanding and appreciation of the other.

Because each gender represents one half of the whole, they need comprehension and intermingling with the other to experience wholeness.  The plan of evolution is well conceived.  If the two genders ignore each other, they increase their isolation from wholeness and become increasingly subject to the impact of illusions, glamours and maya that leads to intense suffering and victimization, which ultimately takes them to the nadir experience of total helplessness and despair in which the individual becomes motivated to seek Love above all else.

Q8: How Can the Female Self Help the Male Self

JULIE:          You said that what a female needs to do for herself is find the source of Love within herself instead of looking for it outside.  What can a female best give a male to heal their relationship and assist him to grow— both the male within herself and the outer male?

MONITOR: The Female Self most often desires to be cherished.  As she gives to the Male Self what she most desires, she uses her creative ability to give what fulfills the male.  In her giving, she becomes eligible to receive the return gift.

When the Female Self, or woman, seeks to receive without first giving, they are most likely destined to be frustrated.  The Male Self, or man, is in a complementary position.  If the Male Self, or man, fails to act upon the motive of Love and create actions of Love for self and others, he is destined to experience frustration.  When the Male Self learns the potential of Love from the female, he can then conceive of the motive which he may activate.  And when he acts with Love for the female, then she receives what she most desires.

If the Female Self, or woman, waits for Love to arrive from another Self or another person, she does not use her creative ability.  If the Male Self, or man, does not act with the motive of Love, he becomes distracted and lost in learning the lessons of power which leads him to a stalemate, because power, used without the motive of Love, produces the basis for continuing fear.  Fear separates Selves and individuals from the experience of spiritual connection and Love.

When the two genders act with motives that are most conducive to their growth, they contribute most to the growth of the other.  Their complementarity produces a dynamic synthesis and acceleration in the rate of learning.  The action of Grace may then be invoked as an expression of Higher Consciousness and androgynous force.

Concluding Remarks

In conclusion, we encourage each person to meet and engage in ongoing .idialogue; with your Female Self.  Learn her qualities, abilities and hopes.  Learn what she fears and form agreements with her concerning how you, the Outer Self, may support her and her goals, and how she may support you and your goals.

Ask her to connect with the High Self as often as possible in promoting her own learning and gaining assistance when she encounters difficulties.

When you, the Outer Self, feel depleted, disconnected or down, ask your Female Self to give you the experience of Love that you may be reminded of the true nature of creation.

We look forward to continued discussions concerning the Selves of the personality and how their integration may be achieved.  We thank you all for participating in this discussion.  We bless each one, and we leave you now.

GROUP: Thank you, Monitor.

EXERCISE: Drawing to Better Understand the Female Self

For those who are interested, we suggest that you take ten or fifteen minutes for an exercise.  Ask your Female Self, whether you know her or not, to guide the drawing of a picture.  The picture will express whatever your Female Self wishes to express.  When the picture is completed, carefully examine it and ask your Female Self to explain it to you.  You may focus attention upon the entire picture and upon specific details within it.  This type of exercise may take as long as twenty or thirty minutes yet produce an opportunity for developing understanding and rapport between Outer Self and Female Self.  It is likely to produce a sense of satisfaction.